the lads

Every time a church bell rings, Mr. T pities a fool.

Mr. T doesn't pity anyone who likes the Black Eyed Peas. He just kills them.

Ever have a sharp pain in your chest that you can't explain? That was Mr. T, and it was a warning.

Mr. T speaks only when necessary. His main form of communication is folding his arms and slowly shaking his head. And regardless of the situation, he is always understood.

Mr. T once punched Chuck Norris at the exact moment he roundhouse kicked Mr. T in the chest. The result was the 80's.

All that glitters is not gold: If it's not being worn by Mr. T, then it's just jibba jabba, and Mr. T pities the fool who can't tell the difference. This is where the phrase "fool's gold" comes from.

Mr. T invented fools. Realizing the magnitude of his folly, he then created Pity.

Mr. T once captured Big foot, but released him after he shaved the beast and realized that it was just Chuck Norris walking around naked in the woods.

23. That's the number of people Mr. T has pitied in the time it has taken you to read this sentence.

On the A-team, Face, Hannibal, and Murdock were all masters of disguise. Mr T didn't have to wear a disguise. The bad guys didn't recognize him out of fear.

Michael Jackson is the only fool that Mr. T refuses to pity. He finds that it would be insulting to the pity.

Mr. T pities fools because even fools deserve their daily dose of vitamin T.

You can lead Mr. T to water, but chances are that you will die there.

Mr. T coined the phrase; "I see dead people," after the waiting staff at Denny's forgot his birthday.

When he found out he would lose the rematch while making Rocky III, Mr. T administered Sylvester Stallone an angry look. Seeing Mr. T's anger broke every bone in Sly's face left him mildly retarded and unable to remember the incident. To this day, Sly has no idea why he shits his pants at the mere sight of a black man with a Mohawk.

If you were born before 1980, there is a good chance that Mr. T is your father. If you were born after, it's guaranteed.

There are only four horsemen of the apocalypse, because Mr. T is going to walk.

Like King Midas, everything Mr. T touches turns to gold, even food. Unlike King Midas, Mr. T has learned to ingest gold, like a real man would.

Mr. T once beat Mike Tyson in a boxing match with only his left thumb. After the three second match was over, Mr. T pitied Mike Tyson so bad that he began to talk funny.

Mr. T is allergic to doorknobs. That's why he can only kick through doors.

Mr. T pities the fool who doesn't pity the fool, thus creating a never-ending loop of pity and pain.

Mr. T's edition of the VH1 show 'Where Are They Now' was the shortest in the show's history. It was 10 seconds long, and consisted of a black screen with the words "Right Behind You" written on it.

Mr. T once stated that he "doesn't wail on sissy boys." This led to the pink polo shirts with popped collars craze. Little do those pitiful fools know that Mr. T was just making it easier to find sissy boys to wail on.

Mr. T. does not break wind. He destroys it.

Mr. T didn't know Rocky was a movie. He just wanted to kick the shit out of a white guy and steal his bitch, A-team style.

Mr. T does not know you personally, but the odds are 7 in 10 that he pities you.

When Mr. T received his star on Hollywood's Walk of Fame, he made his hand prints after the cement was dry.

Mathematicians use Mr. T’s pity for fools as a demonstration of the concept of infinity.

Mr. T is not black. It's just that the sun is to afraid to shine on him.

Mr. T and Chuck Norris once encountered each other on a lonesome British path. Before the inevitable battle could begin, the earth shit itself and created Whales.

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That guys dumb!...... and he's and ass!
He's a DUMB ASS!!!